Written Especially For Me...

As I sit in front of the computer, I know that I am supposed to start writing something about how God has been stretching me and using others to help me to see His amazing grace, glory, love, and joy...but I am having a hard time putting all of that into words.
Have you ever had an experience that is so profound...so far beyond your own ability to describe in a way that you can do justice to what you have felt? Yeah...that's me right now.
I can't really say that it is just ONE thing that has just totally rocked my world into a new and unknown place, but rather a series of events that has really started to show me that I just have no idea what I'm in for in regards to my future. It's funny when you sit down and reflect on the path that God has led you to recognize all of the little "Y's" or "T's" or even dead ends in the road that you have been journeying on. I've always liked Robert Frost's poem, "The Road Less Traveled" and it has again popped into my head while writing this blog. It seems to me that a lot of the best things that have ever happened to me were when I took that overgrown, not-so-familiar path.
We all have choices. Choices to go left or right, up or down, east or west, to take a new job and leave behind all that is familiar or to stay and wait things out, to try out a new church or stay where we are not being spiritually fed because it is comfortable, go to a Bible study with strangers or stay at home because it's summer vacation...the list can go on and on and on. Each one of the above mentioned things, along with a list of many more, have brought me to where I am right now. Through a little bit of fear (okay...a lot), a lot of trust, some pushing from loved ones and obedience to go onto that road that hasn't been traveled before, God has been continually blessing me. I can see the things that are so incredibly awesome in my life as a result of following Him. And the things that are hard to deal with, stressful and causing anxiety and pain? Yeah...those are a result of not listening and trying to do things my way. (Frank Sinatra, I am not...at least I am really, really trying to learn that I can't do things MY way...)
A year or so ago, I was going through a study that was trying to break through my thick skull to tell me that the more I follow God and where HE wants me to go, the more I will hear from Him and will have a more fruitful harvest from being obedient. As you can see, it's taken me a while to really hear (two-fold, I guess) that message.
The study that I am currently doing has been the most incredible experience EVER. Each time that I sit down with my workbook and Bible, it is as if the author has written at the top of the page, "Dear Lindsay, I hope you are really ready to pay attention and learn from this lesson today. It was written especially for you." I AM NOT KIDDING. It's ridiculous how much this study seems to be written just for me. The coolest part, I think is that since it is so applicable to my life, then it has to be the same way for other women, right? I know that I have spent a lot of time over the past few years moaning and groaning that NO ONE else could possibly know what I was going through, experiencing, feeling, blah blah blah. BUT! It seems as if there are a lot of other women out there who know EXACTLY what I've been feeling or it wouldn't keep appearing on the pages of my workbook, right?
About a week ago, I was completing a lesson that was one that I desperately needed to hear at that very moment.
"In the Song of Songs, the lover comes, leaping across the mountains, and invites his beloved to go higher with him:
"Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me." (Song of Songs 2:10)
But she is content. She has camped out "in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places on the mountainside." (2:14) At this point, she refuses to go higher with him, afraid of what it might involve.
So many women are like that. They are satisfied with where they are. They've gone so far with the Lord, and then they camp out in the hiding places....He longs to set us free...(I) want to live in such a way that I continually let Him take me to higher places."
I don't want to camp out in my hiding places. I want to be taken higher. Immediately after reading that lesson, I felt an incredible presence come over me. I excused myself from where I was and went to the most private place I could find and I got down on my knees, praying and crying out to God that I knew there was much that I was holding on to, trying to control and it was holding Him back from blessing me with His best. He knows that it is hard...but I promised to let go of all that I was grasping and asked for His help to do so. A few days later, this message appeared in my inbox from a dear and sweet friend.
My Princess…Wait on me
Wait on me, my Princess. My timing is always perfect. I know you’re anxious about many things, and I see your passion for all the plans I have put in your heart. I know that you long to fly, and I see your enthusiasm. However, just as a vine dresser nurtures the vine and waits patiently for the right moment to harvest the grapes, so too am I working tirelessly to prepare you to bear much fruit. Don’t run ahead of Me or try to fly before my plans are complete. Your strength will fail you, and your dreams will wither away. Trust me that My dreams for you are far greater than you can dream on your own. You will run farther and soar higher if you will patiently wait for the season of My blessing. Draw close to Me now, and I promise that this season of waiting will bring you the sweetest of rewards.
Love,
Your King and Lord of perfect timings
from "His Princess – Love Letters From Your King” by Sheri Rose Shepherd
I don't know about you, but that message was surely heaven sent, straight into my head and my heart, giving me the most perfect peace imaginable. God has been sending me messages and I'm so glad that I have been put onto a path that I can recognize them, appreciate them, learn from them, and put them in my pocket to take out and enjoy another day.